writings from 2018
13 Jan 2018
from a hotel hallway i nabbed half an old cheese platter, most wedges still in tact. my mind was divided: the stodgy conservative at the front of my brain said: dont eat other people's leftovers, thats what rats do; but the woke-up partyboy sitting at the back said, hey, good enough for a rat, good enough for me.
~
5 Mar 2018
nothing more satisfying than seein a stranger achieve a personal milestone. a beard dude on st georges terrace was sitting on the steps of the closed church and i could see he was on the very last page (!!) of the Bible (!!!). I waited to see him finish it, and soon enough he did, slowly closing and putting it down beside him. Then he looked up at the sky scrapers around him. he looked a really long time, processing all the lessons heād learnt, all the character arcs he'd overseen.
~
22 Mar 2018
fuckin god damn willy wagtails, filling their mouths up with tree sap and spitting down onto my new leather couch. what do they think this is? the War?
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26 Mar 2018
some dude put his āVintage Freddo Frog Collectionā up on gumtree. when i called to inquire about the price, i discovered his "collection" was just an unopened 16-frog sharepack from 2005. still, i am picking them up from dianella at 6pm tomorrow.
~
15 April 2018
forget gizzfest, please head to yizfest. lineup is me, shirtless, in my backyard, playing the drums
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10 May 2018
im perth there is a great debate about the correct use of the term 'improv'. the comedians say, nah, improvs about smiling and having fun at the funny jokes. the musicians say, no, improv is about frowning and being scared at the scary noises.
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11 July 2018
if you see a jogger wearing a confederate flag t-shirt, are they racist? what if it just turns out theyre wearing two white n blue lanyards over a plain red shirt, and that theyre crisscrossed ergonomically to avoid bouncing about on the jog home? are they still racist?
~
28 August 2018
the advent of coles minis is the first time since the 2000 olympics that 100% of australians have felt culturally united. tearing into that plastic foil, i feel we stand together as one.
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22 Sept 2018
today a very little girl tapped my shoulder and whispered "did you know that.. snoopy once hadā¦ a tiny human son"
30 Sept 2018
last afternoon sitting on the porch, i could hear the whoops, chants and hollers rise from houses near and far. i felt so united. eagles are the best, dockers fucking suck. together the whole city chanted - freeeeo, they are so slow, kick em in the bum and they still wont go!
~
1 Oct 2018
"dad, why is there a live pigeon in the recycling bin?"
"i thought it was dead"